This girl of mine seems to be carefree. More often than not you'll find her with a smile on her face.
Even gleeful most of the time.
But, there are times when it is apparent that there is so much more going on inside. There are times of introspection that aren't readily apparent.
We've had several discussions lately, precipitated by her, regarding her beginnings. She's asked, "Why couldn't my birthmom keep me? How do babies get to an orphanage? Did I have a name when I was found? Should I love you more than my birthmom"(that one gave me a goose egg as big as a baseball in the pit of my stomach)
During our latest discussion, she asked about the orphanage and what would her life would be like if she still lived in China. Then she got really quiet. Not wanting to press, I sat there quietly with her and said nothing. Finally, I asked her why she was so quiet and she said, "I was just thinking about what it would be like if I still lived in China. I might not even know about "Frozen"! (At least I can rest assured she has her priorities in the right places. Imagine…not knowing about the movie "Frozen"… a travesty indeed!).
The other night at dinner John was calling Abbey a "spicy girl". She knows that this is what the Chinese say about girls from her province, Chongqing. Abbey piped in and said, "No, I'm not a spicy girl, I'm an American girl!" Whoa! Was I ever shocked to hear this tone come from her. I wonder if she's going to try to distant herself from her birth culture, as I've read some adoptees do?
This is new to all of us, so we will muddle through the best we can. We will pray for God to give us wisdom and sensitivity. I will constantly reassure her that she is loved and valued more than she will ever comprehend. I'll always be willing to listen to her questions, even though I have very few answers, which is very frustrating to me. I can imagine that it might be even more frustrating to her. Will she one day seek the answers, or will she be content with the "I don't knows"? Time will tell. Either way, we will be there for her.
I'm so grateful for this young girl and the blessings she brings every single day to our lives. She is truly a gift to us!
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